Let there be 'Light'

...And there was.

...And it was good.

As I turn 32 today, I realize how life is unceasingly funny. Ever since I seriously began considering the implications of changing my name to ‘Light’ I’ve encountered much reassurance as to why it was the right thing for me to do. It’s like I say in yoga class, “Doing what’s right for you doesn’t always feel good.” In fact, sometimes it can be very uncomfortable. But at the root of that discomfort you’ll oftentimes find new growth, new experience and new wisdom.

The majority of you have been very supportive of the name change, and I would like to thank you for that. But still, the big question is “Why?” I’ve never been big on trying to convince people of anything, but I would like to share a little of what I’ve learned about words and vibration, and hopefully this will clear up some of the confusion around my name change.

Let me just start by acknowledging that changing my name to ‘Light’ isn’t meant, in any way, to take away from my birth name. I’ve always liked 'Derry' and I was particularly amused when I discovered a few years ago that the name Derry comes from an Irish folk hero who, as it turns out, was a great lover---a sort of Don Juan of Ireland! Not a bad name to live up to.

But from a scientific point of view, I came into a greater understanding of the way words can affect us on a molecular level. One of my biggest influences in this context is the research of Dr. Emoto (his book is Hidden Messages in Water). Dr. Emoto discovered that high-vibration words like ‘love’, ‘gratitude’, ‘light’, and ‘peace’ (just to name a few) have an alchemistic effect on water crystals. ‘High vibration’ words have the ability to transform distorted water molecules into beautiful, healthier water crystals. Considering the fact that the human body is over 65% water, changing my name could benefit my overall health and vitality.

And from a spiritual perspective, words are thoughts expressed. Thoughts are the creative power of the universe. Nothing is created without first being realized as a thought vibration. Therefore, words have vibration, and our names carry a certain vibration embedded within them. For instance, there’s a reason parents don’t name their children Hitler, or Napoleon. That’s because, intuitively, parents understand that those names have a potential to be accompanied not only by Hitler-like or Napoleon-like vibrations, but by energetically matching responses to those names from callers.

Therefore, the name Light is an affirmation and a reminder of who I really am: I am spirit! In other words, I am a light being experiencing myself in human form. It bridges any sense of separation between my individual self (Derry from Alabama) and my universal self (a spirit of light and love with unlimited potential). As a result, a positive shift happens in my consciousness (and in the consciousness of the caller) as we are constantly reminded of our true nature. In that sense, Light can even be viewed as a communal name.

Believe me, I already tried talking myself out of it. Who wants to go through the potential ridicule of changing their name to ‘Light’ (especially because it sounds like such an “L.A.” thing to do)? After deliberating over the idea for about 3 weeks, I realized that much of the reason why I wouldn't do it was because I would have been concerned with what other people thought. And that just wasn't a good enough reason. Luckily for me, I don’t take myself too seriously. At all. So if you know any good 'Light' jokes, I’d love to hear them.

In the meantime, I’ve devised a little game called, What’s Your Spiritual Name? It goes like this: if you had to change your name, and it had to be a word from the dictionary, and you had to pick it in 30 seconds or less, what would it be? The first word to come to mind (by divine inspiration of course) would be your spiritual name. So far, I’ve heard names like 'Truth', ‘Ocean’, ‘Integrity’, ‘Oneness’, ‘Omniscient’, and ‘Passion’. What would yours be?

Asking the Right Questions

Today I went to the farmer's market at Plummer Park to get some sprouts for my daily salad and some fresh local fruit for snacking. I'm setting an intention to eat raw foods indefinitely. Actually, I saw an iridologist (someone who diagnoses your health by reading lines in the whites of your eyes as well as your iris) last week. He informed me that I have an impacted colon. It wasn't all that surprising because I've heard that twice before, once from another iridologist and once from a microscopist (someone who diagnoses your health by reading analyzing your blood cells). Besides, I'd rather know exactly what state of health I'm in at any given time.

Anyway, I went home after the session and conducted a bunch of research on line. And as it turns out, almost everyone has an impacted colon (or a case of constipation). Basically, unless it takes you only a few seconds to go to the bathroom (like it does animals), then your are considered constipated. And just because you're a vegan for years doesn't mean that your colon will immediately become un-impacted. Most of us are walking around with dried, impacted feces lining the pockets our intestinal walls and hindering the overall elimination process. In order to clean out the pipes, so to speak, all the holistic "experts" advise a raw food diet in tandem with a colon cleanse program. So I decided to give it a shot. Anyone who has kicked an addiction or been on a strict diet knows that this is a moment-by-moment kind of thing, where you have to keep making the choice to go in the direction you set for yourself.

A friend who died of breast cancer back in 2001 was also seeing a naturopathic doctor who advised her on how to shift her perspective when faced with the inevitable temptation to fall off the dietary wagon.

He said, instead of asking these sort of questions beforehand: "Is this one little bag of potato chips (for example) going to kill me if I eat it? (Of course not.)" or, "If I eat this candybar just this once, is it really going to make that big of a difference? (Maybe not.)"

Instead, ask yourself these types of questions: "Is this going to give me the result I desire? (No!) Is this going to add to my optimum health? (No!)" By shifting the questions around, the answers become loud and clear, your resolve becomes stronger and your intention in that moment solidifies.

I've tried eating raw before and it is a challenge for me, and not only because of the convenience of cooked food. I still very much desire certain cuisines and dishes. But my desire to have a clean, clear, perfectly functioning colon definitely outweighs the desire to have thai food every now and again. Besides, the intestinal cleanse that I found lasts only about 90 days, and we'll see what happens after that. I've just got to stay on course and keep asking the right questions.

A Sense of Anticipation?

Years ago, I saw a very funny comic strip in the New York Post that I still laugh about from time to time: The first scene shows 2 elderly friends, in their final stages of life, sitting on a park bench. One leans over to the other and says, “You know, I want more of a sense of anticipation in my life.” And the other quips, “Well, start leaving your front door open at night before you go to bed.”

This strip remined me of my desire to have the burglar bars on the front window of my otherwise beautiful apartment removed. I’ve wanted to have them removed ever since moving in and, recently, I asked the landlord to remove them. He dryly told me that getting the bars down was my problem and not his... you know how landlords can be. I lovingly replied that it may be viewed by the officials in the City of West Hollywood as a fire hazard, to which he retorted, “Well, you can always jump out the back window.” “Where would I land, sir? I’m on the top floor of the building?” “Oh, it’s only 3 flights up. You wouldn’t be hurt…”

He clearly wasn’t concerned about my safety. All he could think about was the $200 in labor that it would cost him to have the bars removed. I guess I can understand that. Although, I have to admit, the lower vibration part of me halfway wished that my apartment would catch fire, prompting me to nosedive from my back window, break my neck, and die… all just to see the look on his face when the authorities come to his house to arrest his 70-year old frame for not spending the measly $200 bucks (if that) it would’ve cost him take the burglar bars down. But I got out of that space quickly, took in a deep breath, thanked him for considering it, and got off the phone.

A couple of months went by. During that time, I asked friends if the burglar bars bothered them. And surprisingly, no one had even noticed them. It’s not that they were overtly obtrusive, or even ugly. In fact, they blended in quite well with my vertical blinds.

But it was the symbol of having a cage on my window that I could no longer live with. And I realized that the metaphorical value of having them down was infinitely greater than the $200 it would cost to have them removed. So I placed an ad on Craiglist, offering $100 bucks (hey, you never know) for a professional to help me take them down. This nice guy named Scott replied right away, and the next day he came over and together, we liberated my view to the world below. I felt like Andy Dufresne at the end of Shawshank Redemption, bursting out of that pipeline full of sewage, throwing his hands up, bathing in the raindrops of freedom.

I know that sounds dramatic, but to put it into context, I’ve been liberating my fears, one by one, little by little, for years now. I haven’t locked my doors in years, nor do I lock my car, or my locker in the gym when I teach my classes. I think locks and bars provide a false sense of security and put a message out to the universe that one is preparing to be violated. And in response, the Universe would answer that message by placing me in a situation where I would be violated, rationing, “hey, you’ve done all this wonderful preparation, so let’s put it to the test… see what you’ve got.” The Universe can have a wonderfully ironic sense of humor.

Besides, ever hear of a house that was “broken into” where the doors were unlocked?

To further illustrate my point, think about it: Everybody knows or has been around dramatic people, right? And do you ever notice that dramatic things always seem to happen to dramatic people? Likewise, funny things always happen to funny people, and suspicious things that would rarely happen to anyone else, ALWAYS happen to paranoid people.

So I figure, why not be free and liberated from fear, and in return, see if the Universe responds by placing me in various freedom-acquiring situations. Instead of preparing to be violated I’ll prepare to experience an unparalleled sense of freedom… from lack, limitation, fear, you name it!

It’s an experiment, so let’s see what happens.